wild card weekend preview

The time is upon us.

The 2007 NFL postseason is only a day away, and my heart races at the prospect of watching my Seahawks take on the Washington Redskins tomorrow afternoon at Qwest Field.

And yes, I'll admit, it's partially from a fairly rabid state of being as fired up as a coked-up bank robber stepping into Wells Fargo, and partially apprehension at facing a touted rival on an emotionally-driven hot streak.

It's insane to think that the Seahawks are facing a rival that dealt with so much emotional turmoil this year, with the shooting death of one of its best players, safety Sean Taylor. It's hard to root against them, that much is for sure, but the matchup has the innerworkings of a game you'll definitely want to watch. (Word to the jinx committee: I'm not calling a final score with respect to you & the karma gods.)

I will, however, call 'em as I see 'em, and the rest of the playoff picture in my Wild Card Weekend picks...


SEATTLE over Washington

Follow the Sports Guys' advice...

Do NOT pick a bad or otherwise obscure QB on the road in the playoffs. It's just not what you want to do, no matter if the Vegas odds are luring you into pissing your money away or taking a "sleeper" bet (whatever the hell that means anyway.)
You should especially not go with this type of pick when they're coming to a tough stadium for a playoff game that's bound to be as intense as the final few minutes of every Michael Bay movie ever made. Just don't do it.
And, my friends, Todd Collins is just that kind of bet. Seattle's going to be firing on all cylinders and they're going to play to win.


Jags over STEELERS

Even if Shitsburgh pulls a win out of their banged-up asses in this lopsided matchup (which, by the way, doesn't matter in the slightest that it's being played at slop-covered Heinz Field) they won't get very far past that unless they start feeding their practice squad truckloads of steroids, vodka and PCP.
The Jags don't give up leads, and though David Garrard isn't a quarterback that's going to win a game for your team singlehandedly, he sure as hell won't lose one for you, either. Their one-two punch in RBs Maurice Jones-Drew and Fred Taylor doesn't just have the advantage here because they can actually walk and are going up against 3rd-string defensive ends, but they're just plain better than Najeh Davenport. (Note: Is it just me, or is this postseason the Year of the Obscure? Najeh Davenport, LaRon Landry, Earnest Graham, Todd Collins and Jeff Garcia are the names we're invariably dropping a lot when discussions involving starting lineups begin. Six months ago, I would've recognized two of those names, and only vaguely. What the hell?!)


TAMPA BAY over NY Giants

Look, I don't care about the Little Manning excuses/defenses/justifications of throwing 5 picks in one half. He's probably the 2nd-weakest starting QB in the playoff behind Vince Young (THE MADDEN CURSE CLAIMS YET ANOTHER VICTIM) and seems to look more than a little lost out there at times.
Meanwhile, the Bucs' defense is playing like they're actually real pirates, plundering and pillaging opponents' offensive schemes, despite the fact that the team overall looked apathetic at best over the past two weeks of the regular season. I think they can count on experience of Jeff Garcia and the emergence of Earnest Graham as everyone's favorite fantasy RB sleeper this year to help them come on out on top, but Little Manning might channel some big-brother power (hell, Peyton IS on a bye week) and shock the living shit out of the entire population of the state of Florida. Even if most of them are too old to hear it.


CHARGERS over Titans

It's amazing how Phillip Rivers still has the respect of any fan in San Diego after visibly yelling "SHUT UP!!!" to the fans about a month or so ago. To top it off, there was that unflattering incident with the Broncos that might still rest firm in the recent memory banks of both teams - especially when LT had his helmet chucked halfway to Mexico at one point during the game - but the Chargers should be high-powered enough to easily forge a victory on their own turf against a QB who's been hit with the Madden Curse.
(That of course means the Titans could theoretically blow a 36-point lead in the 4th quarter at the 2-minute warning, by definition.)
The cards are stacked way too high against the Titans in this one. Shit, some people don't even think they should be in the playoffs to begin with, but here they are, flying to San Diego with a bulls-eye painted on their chests and a sign on their asses that says "PLACE FOOT HERE." DOOMED, I tell you.
Still, this doesn't change the fact that Norv Turner is inevitably going to lead Rivers and company into a full-fledged freefall next week, because they're from San Diego and probably can't handle an outdoor stadium in January anywhere except Southern California.

On the bright side, after next week they'll have plenty of time to watch reruns of "The OC."