So, let me get this straight - this machine could potentially take the planet and shove its head so far up its own ass that we could suddenly be seeing alternate dimensions? Sounds like we're either ultimately fucked or going to be spending the rest of our lives seeing what it was like to be Robert Downey Jr. on any given night in the mid-90s.
Either way, this is disturbing. I mean, the mere possibility of alternate/parallel dimensions is undeniably awesome, and I'm willing to entertain that notion. But the fact that they're developing this super-atomizing ass-plow in some underground laboratory and just waiting to push the big red button makes me raise an eyebrow and wonder how the hell they're getting the funding for this.
"So, Dr. Cox, what does this machine do exactly?"
"It re-creates the conditions we think were happening at the time of the Big Bang."
"So....how does it work?"
"Well, it fires a bunch of massive proton beams that crash into each other at the rate of about 800,000 per second, which could possibly open the doorway to alternate dimensions."
"Oh, playing god again? Sounds like fun."
"Indeed, sir."
*writes check*
"There you go. Have fun!"
I'm not scientifically-savvy enough to really know what the hell might become of things should this scenario go completely awry, but let me just say one thing:
If everything goes to hell, I'm calling this guy -
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